Template:Did you know nominations/Summer Rayne Oakes

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Summer Rayne Oakes

Summer Rayne Oakes in 2018
Summer Rayne Oakes in 2018
  • Reviewed: InvisiblePeople.tv
  • Comment: If I didn't have a length shortage, I'd combine the two hooks. Or more: Summer Rayne is her real name; she lives with a chicken that she takes on the New York City subway to modeling assignments... No shortage of "hooks" for this article!

Moved to mainspace by GRuban (talk). Self-nominated at 19:35, 21 May 2019 (UTC).

  • Symbol confirmed.svg I like the first hook (eco-model). The alternate is quirky, but I don't think it's as notable? The sources for the eco-model hook are good. Picture in article is from commons. I don't see any copyright issues. Originally written a while ago, but moved to the main space on May 20, so counts as recent. Looks good to me. Thanks for writing this article! QuakerSquirrel (talk) 19:18, 23 May 2019 (UTC)
  • Symbol question.svg Hi, I came by to promote ALT1, but the hook needs a few more words to make it grammatically correct, and then it closely paraphrases the source:
  • ALT0a: ... that Summer Rayne Oakes became known as "the world's first eco-model" because she only models clothes made from organic or recycled materials?
  • Here's the source:
  • Oakes only models clothing made from organic or recycled materials. Yoninah (talk) 22:56, 20 June 2019 (UTC)
  • I'm fine with the change. --GRuban (talk) 00:24, 21 June 2019 (UTC)
  • Template:Ping what do you mean? You are copying the source both in the hook and the article. Yoninah (talk) 14:30, 21 June 2019 (UTC)
Ah; your objection is that it's too close a paraphrase? Honestly, I don't think there is a way to convey the meaning in a less close paraphrase. It's not that long a sentence, there aren't that many ways to say it. The items that need to be covered are
  1. Summer Rayne Oakes
  2. is called "the world's first eco-model"
  3. due to only modeling organic/recycled clothes
If you can think of any single sensible sentence that contains all three points, and you consider it a less close paraphrase than the current, I will likely be happy with it. If you can't think of one, then I have to take that as evidence there isn't really another way to say it, and run with it as is. --GRuban (talk) 14:40, 21 June 2019 (UTC)