Template:Did you know nominations/São José Paquete Africa
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Revision as of 09:06, 28 June 2015 by imported>Casliber (gtg)
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São José Paquete Africa
- ...
that the São José Paquete Africa (divers pictured) lost hundreds of lives?
Created by Alanscottwalker (talk). Self-nominated at 19:16, 5 June 2015 (UTC).
- A decent article, new enough, long enough and reliably sourced. I've fixed a couple of issues in the writing. However, the hook above won't do; it simply doesn't make sense grammatically and it's not especially interesting (as there are many shipwrecks in which hundreds died). I'd suggest something like the following. Prioryman (talk) 07:40, 7 June 2015 (UTC)
- ALT1: ... that the wreck of the São José Paquete Africa (divers pictured) is the first shipwreck ever discovered of a working slave ship, lost while in transit with its human cargo?
- Thank but well, of course, it makes grammatical sense (noun-verb) but I won't argue over "interest" in peoples' lives (no other shipwreck has been discovered where the forced aboard died like this, and the sources certainly show interest in their lives and deaths) - but the admins may do what they will with the hook. Alanscottwalker (talk) 14:17, 7 June 2015 (UTC)
I'm afraid the original hook simply doesn't make sense. A ship can't "lose" lives. It's an inanimate object without any agency of its own. You could say that lives were lost in a shipwreck, or on board, or in some other event, but the agent in such a sentence is not the ship itself. I can't approve the original hook - people would be all over it to complain, and rightly so - so if ALT1 isn't used then some other alternative will have to be found. Another reviewer will have to take a look at ALT1. Prioryman (talk) 20:16, 7 June 2015 (UTC)
- Here is an article referring to a "ship's lost lives" [1] Many things are inanimate but they are still referred to in standard writing as doing things (and of course ships in particular are regularly given the human pronoun) - otherwise, you could not write sentences like 'the ship ran aground', or 'the car sped along', or 'the building stood 100 m. tall', etc., etc. Regardless, as I said, I am not insisting you approve the Original - that has got to be the least important thing, here. Alanscottwalker (talk) 23:50, 7 June 2015 (UTC)
- Thank but well, of course, it makes grammatical sense (noun-verb) but I won't argue over "interest" in peoples' lives (no other shipwreck has been discovered where the forced aboard died like this, and the sources certainly show interest in their lives and deaths) - but the admins may do what they will with the hook. Alanscottwalker (talk) 14:17, 7 June 2015 (UTC)
